What's stopping you? I think I know.

"I had $4000 in my purse and I felt miserable."

“I sat on a bench in a park with $4000 in my purse, and I felt miserable.”

My mom shared this story with me a few years ago, and it’s still vivid in my mind. It happened back in the 90s.

You see, my mom’s mother is an ultra-control freak who’s worked methodically, year after year, to make sure my mom has no sense of self-worth.

“Who’d give you that much money?!” she’d tell her when mom shared the salary she was after.

“Who’d hire you for such a position?!” she’d say before Mom went to an important job interview.

Sometimes, when Mom would lose her temper, Granny would retort with something like, “Stop screaming at me. No wonder no man wants you.”

Since my parents are divorced, and I’d spent a lot of time with granny as a child, I’d heard similar things about myself, too.

I managed to move away from her toxic influence, though. At 14, I moved in with my dad. At 17, I got a live-in job in tourism. At 19, I went to university. I grew, changed, and now, I live a better life than my grandma could imagine.

But mom… She’s been stuck, failing at relationships, failing at earning good money, failing at everything her mother has always told her — and keeps telling her! — she’d fail at.

For a few years in the 90s, though, my mom found a job in the service industry, serving wealthy people, and she was getting a lot of tips. At the time of the $4K day, we both still lived with Granny.

If granny learns you have money, she takes it to run the household.

If you move out because you decide you earn enough to afford it, granny comes at your door, asking what “enough” means and blaming you for wasting your money on rent when she has an available bedroom.

So, there my mom was, after her night shift, sitting on that bench in the morning sun, thinking about opening a little fruits and veggies store.

But she was worried Grandma would ruin it.

She thought about moving out with me, but she thought Grandma would ruin it.

She also feared what would follow if, at a certain point, she had to go back to Grandma again.

Full of fears, self-doubt, and self-pity, my mom wasted the money in a casino, winning some first but determinedly continuing to play until she’d lost everything.

And that’s how self-worth — or lack thereof — works.

What would you do if you knew for a fact that you’re your industry’s hidden talent? How would you behave differently? How would you speak to clients? How would you position your skills? What would you prioritize?

Because—let me tell you something you probably haven’t considered—you are my mom.

You are sitting there with a wealth of knowledge, inspiration, and ideas, and you feel miserable. You feel like you’re not worth all your amazing gifts.

Well, you are.

And luckily, this is not the type of wealth that you could lose in a casino.

So stop sitting there. Get up and go do something. Try something. Anything.

Doing something is always better than doing nothing because doing something always comes with a lesson.

And when you believe you’re worth it, you take that lesson and keep on going.

You know you can always ask me exactly what to do or how to do it better, right? I’ll tell you everything I’ve learned in the past 10 years & point you in the right direction if I don’t know something.

Just keep trying, okay?

I promise it will work.

Here’s to knowing how great you are.

Maya